Small Talk

Small Talk 003: Chivalry’s Resurrection

A friend just got out of a relationship with a guy who wasn't really up to her caliber — he was tall and handsome, but also controlling and untrusting. After a year or so in love, they finally ended their relationship, and she's finally feeling happy and free and, most importantly, ready to date. A friend of a friend introduced her to a new guy, and on their first date, she mentioned that he

  1. was standing outside of his car, waiting for her to come out so he could open the car door for her,
  2. did not take out his phone once while they were out, and she legitimately has no idea what type of a phone he has because she never saw it,
  3. noticed that she was a bit cold and without a thought, took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders

As we're hearing this story and getting giddy in the lunch room, the mood shifts slightly, and we all wonder aloud:

Why is it that when a guy opens a door or gives us his undivided attention or puts a coat over us, we feel surprised/smitten? Why are these acts of decency seen as rarities

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Ghost Buster.

screen-shot-2017-01-11-at-8-50-20-pm

A friend, let’s call her Nina, told me that she had recently been hanging out with a guy that she had been acquaintances with for the past few years. Things were going great, the chemistry was there, and she was really going with the flow — yay! A few dates in, Nina was pretty pleased with where this was going,

until she suddenly realized that she was going nowhere.
Alone.

All of their mediums of conversation (IG, FB, Snap, text) became barren. She had heard of people being ghosted before, but had no clue that it would happen to her, especially since he apparently couldn’t tap his thumbs to text her back but was still double-tapping on all of her photos.

I think the most irritating part for me was that I was very upfront about my intentions. In hanging out and getting to know each other, I was looking for a partner/bae/boyfriend/husband/baby daddy. I told him right off the bat that we were both big kids and should just be honest about everything. If he wasn’t feeling it, why couldn’t he just say it?

I’m an adult

The heartbreak? I could handle.

The “not knowing” was the part I couldn’t.

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For the Fallen Palm Springs Police Officers

The sun shone in my eyes after noon last Saturday, and as any person in my generation does, I checked my texts.

I clicked into the article; it had only been started 23 minutes prior. There was a shooting in Palm Springs, and two officers had been killed, one injured. The Desert Regional Medical Center was on lock down. That’s all the information they had at the moment.

We hear about these incidents nationwide, seemingly more often than normal these days. We read articles; we watch videos; we become concerned, angry, frustrated, and confused. We do not reach a resolution, and as a result, we become desensitized.

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FUN Night Stands | Vol. II

Your 20’s, 30’s … 40’s? 50’s?! (I’m not judging) are for moments of laughter, love, and amazing stories that usually start with a swipe right and end with dignity left behind.

Last year, I conducted research for an article via Facebook status, but I ended up with an abundance of useless stories that made me chuckle and realize that my friends are crazy as hell. I think upon first meeting, most people think I’m a wild child and have interesting stories due to the fact that I used to school everyone on Tinder, but unfortunately, that’s not the case.

Luckily, I do know people who are wild and interesting, so please enjoy the second volume of FUN Night Stands, and if you haven’t read the first one,

are we even really friends?

Enjoy.

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Cheat Codes (Of Conduct In A Relationship)

As I was scrolling through a million pics of KarJenner look-alikes on Tumblr one evening, I decided to sift through my drafts — these posts were most likely created at 3am on my bed in my college apartment, as I questioned my life, but most importantly, asked myself constantly, “Y DON’T BOYZ LYKE ME?”

Then, I found this:

“What are your feelings towards dating someone who has cheated on you in the past (not on you)? If you’ve cheated in a past relationship, is it your obligation to tell your new partner? What are your feelings towards dating someone new who knows that you’ve cheated in the past? What would you do or say (if anything) to your person about your past?

(don’t forget you have 2 people who answered this question in your inbox + potential blog post)”

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Nature vs. Keeping it in Your Pants

The radio stations in LA love to discuss relevant topics attributed to our lives as young 20 something year olds who are just trying to be Snapchat famous (follow me @ KIKIII). A topic they constantly converse over is cheating in a relationship, aka my

favorite
topic
EVER
.

One day, they were discussing whose fault it was in the relationship if someone cheats. and one of the males on the station claimed that

it’s the woman’s fault in the relationship if he cheats. The woman should be keeping herself looking good for her man, so if she starts losing momentum (i.e. doesn’t go to the gym anymore, doesn’t put on make up, etc.), it’s in his nature to find someone else who will look good for him. 

And then I got into an accident.

Just kidding. But I was ready for this ‘radio personality’ to get his ca-rear ended immediately.

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Small Talk

Small Talk 002: Motivation

An entry in my journal on May 17th, 2016:

"I'll keep this as succinct as possible, but lately, I've been very unmotivated.

Tasks that I should be able to complete effortlessly are put off until 'tomorrow' — 'tomorrow' defined as a black hole in time I use as a definitive excuse.
Tasks that require a lot of effort are reacted to with a sigh, followed by a click onto Facebook as I refresh my feed in an attempt to refresh my mind.

Due dates are not as demanding to me as they once felt; my mind wanders off into daydreams about when I'm due for my next dinner date instead.

I haven't been succeeding,
I haven't been failing,
I haven't been trying.

It's unfortunate that I'm currently in this state of mind when I hadn't even planned to travel; if anything, I'd rather roam to an island of inspiration or even to a continent of confidence."

 

 

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Small Talk

Small Talk 001: “Did You Say Thank You?”

Have you ever been in a situation where someone asks if you've thanked someone else for something he or she did while the three of you are in the same vicinity? 
I don't understand why people do that because:

1. If I did thank him/her already, are you implying that you think I'm an ungrateful and impolite little mother fucker who doesn't know how to thank someone? 

2. If I didn't thank him because I am an ungrateful and impolite little mother fucker, are you really putting me on the spot in front of that person? 

2a. And if I thank the person now, upon your question, won't he/she think it is fake and forced because IT TOTALLY IS?!

In conclusion,

Thank you

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Mum’s the Word.

 

I was sitting in the back of a classroom full of 10th graders, the majority of whom are taller than me. Strolling into class late with his Beats blaring, a fresh nose piercing, and jeans that could definitely win a SAG award for different reasons than Leonardo had, Nick took a seat with his other tablemates — two ridiculously shy female students who blushed even while having casual conversations amongst themselves.

Caught in a daze and doodling in my notebook, I thought back on the conversation I had with his teacher. A few days ago, Nick’s teacher informed me that he was identified as an emotionally disturbed child, and had an Individual Education Program. She said he didn’t really like to talk, nor did he care to do his work, and that this was his third high school he’s been in.

You’re a teacher, right?

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I Love You…r Face.

Growing up as a second generation Korean America, you don’t hear the words “I love you” very often. Yung Stina found herself very jealous of her white friends who got love from their parents just because they threw something away in the trash can; meanwhile, my sister and I washed dishes, took out the trash, got straight A’s, and cured cancer, receiving words along the lines of, “Do better.”

With that, saying “I love you” was not really in my vernacular, until I moved to white suburbia and you could love literally everything like I seriously can not even.

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